Saturday, May 17, 2008

Defending the Fatherless (and Myself)

You could not wipe the smile off my face. I was going to mail a package to our sweet girl - a new dress, a puzzle & some snacks. Cara B. is leaving for Haiti on Tuesday & graciously offered to deliver this gift personally to our girl. I'm sure the people in line wondered why I had the goofy grin on my face.

I was excited to see a group from our church outside the grocery store in the "brat barn" (it's a Wisconsin thing). My goofy grin & I walked up & excitedly told about mailing my package & showed pictures of our precious Anchise. What happened next I was not prepared for - a barrage of mostly negative questions both about adoption & politics in Haiti. The whole time I was standing there I was thinking in my head, "let me be salt & light, let me be salt & light". I prayed for words & wisdom.

If anyone considers himself religious and yet does not keep a tight rein on his tongue, he deceives himself and his religion is worthless. Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world.
James 1:26-27

Upon the conclusion of this conversation I realized my joy had been stolen. Don't get me wrong, I LOVE to answer questions about adoption & Haiti. I LOVE IT! Especially when it's someone who has a sincere, heartfelt interest. Ask me anything - I'm an open book! But from this day forward I will not defend this decision. I will not have my joy stolen like a thief in the night. Adoption is the heart of God and I will find my joy & my reward in His words.

14 comments:

ManyBlessings said...

She's got such a smile...you can't help but smile when you see it in those pictures. :) CONGRATULATIONS!!!
d:)

Tim & Sarah said...

Stay strong!

Ginny said...

I had so much fun choosing gifts to send to Moses and Samuel the two times we have had the opportunity to send them things. I also obsessed way too much over what exactly to send. Sorry people got you down after all your fun. I have had to explain why we are adopting from Liberia vs. the U.S. and why we didn't qualify in our own state multiple times. A child is a child! It seems strange sometimes to have to defend your decision to adopt. We love kids so much it is hard for us to understand other people's attitudes sometimes.

Kathy Eden said...

Amen sister!!! {{{ Hugs }}}

Wife to the Rockstar said...

I am so so sorry you had to face this. I will NEVER EVER understand it. As you know we have had a fair share of harsh words blown our way. Keep your eyes on Jesus friend. The world is cold and this why we are fellow "aliens".

Chuck and Juli said...

Thank you for the sweet comment on my blog!

Wow! What a cutie. Congratulations! Too bad you had to pray to be salt and light to Christians! I pray that your joy in this adoption is never again stolen.

Katy said...

Stephanie,
I admire you in staying strong with the rude insensitive comments..You are an amazing person, and following God's lead without question. You will continue to encounter those who will try to steal your joy in God's plan for your family, but remember that you have a friend who completely understands what you are going through. I am so thrilled that you get to send a package to your sweet girl-don't forget to put a family photo in so she can see who is waiting for her!

crispy said...

Those kinds of questions and comments come from ignorance. I am sorry it hurt your feelings none the less. Keep your joy. Find it in obeying God where He has called you to go.

Enjoy the moment of delighting in the little things.

We are all so happy for you. ((hugs))

Cris

poseygirl said...

I truly do not understand how anyone with a heart would not celebrate your joy. I am so sorry they don't understand. I am sending hugs your way, and my own excitement for you.

Lauren

The Gang's All Here! said...

I too am sorry for the negativity those people showed. We've not even got our girl, or a picture, or even a real live girl yet and we've already had our share of the grouchies sharing their views.

But these pics? That should put all the questions right out of your mind. Look at those cheeks! And that smile?! Oh My Word! I could just eat her right up!

Tereasa said...

I'm sorry. That is so tough.

Lord, please wrap us all in your shield of joy. Give us wisdom as others attempt to take our joy away. May we be lights in a lost world! Amen!

Annie said...

I know what you mean. My biggest emotional shock was when I happened into the Christian bookstore - where I am a "regular" and shared my joy. We were just about to adopt our first, Sergei, at that point. I had the air knocked out of me when the owner's comments suggested that I was bringing "who knows what" into my home in terms of "genetic predispositions." I was truly nauseous when I walked out, mainly because of the source. I got a few other comments like that from strangers or acquaintances that are NOT Christian, but that attitude from a Christian person shocked me. And you have the racial component, too. It is sad, but people do say the stupidest things.

Would you mind my referencing this post on my blog?

Salzwedel Family said...

Thank you everyone for your kind words. Your encouragement lifts me up & keeps me moving forward. Bless you all!

Greg's Wife said...

Yes, people are toots about adoption sometimes. We just have to pray the Lord will change people's hearts and remind them that orphans are created by Him & in His likeness just like everyone else. It is especially sad when the hurtful words come from Christians who should know better. Doesn't anyone read their bibles? And how in the world can anyone say anything negative to a photo of someone as cute as Anchise? It is mind boggling!