Tuesday, January 27, 2009

Surrender

I'm afraid this may be a long one. So grab a cup of coffee or a soda of your choice and sit a while. I'm glad you're here...

When we first started our adoption process we were originally planning to adopt from Guatemala. This was before Guatemala closed. Although we found several good agencies and saw many beautiful children that needed homes we just never felt enough peace about it to actually send in an application.

One day I quite casually learned about adopting from Haiti. I'll be honest and say I didn't know or care the first thing about Haiti. However, the thought of bringing home a child from this country could not escape my mind. As the weeks went by the feeling only seemed stronger so I mentioned it to Jeff and asked him to pray about it.

One day before school started we were shopping out of town for kids clothes. A severe storm had gone through during the day and when we arrived home our phone lines weren't working. We checked with a neighbor and they had service so we knew it had to specifically be a problem at our house. Jeff checked the phone and line in the kitchen and didn't see anything out of the ordinary. He went to the bedroom to check the same in there. While he was there he started to pray about the adoption and asked God for direction as to where we were supposed to find our daughter. After he was done praying he unscrewed the little box from the wall and inside was a sticker that simply said, "assembled in Haiti". He came out of the bedroom with a big smile on his face and told me I was right - we were meant to adopt from Haiti. The next morning our phones were miraculously working again. Let's just say we dove in head first and have never looked back despite the financial obstacles in our path.

We originally applied to and planned to work with Children of the Promise. The problem came when we saw Anchise's photo on the Three Angels website as an available child - those eyes, those cheeks, that smile - we didn't stand a chance. We were sunk the minute we saw her. We applied to Three Angels and were soon the proud parents of our precious daughter.

Unfortunately, you most likely know how that ended. Once Anchise was taken back we didn't know what to do. Our precious girl was gone, but we planned that at the first of the year we would decide what to do.

2009 made it's grand entrance and with Three Angels not knowing when or if they would be taking in more children we decided to check out what our other options would be. Our first alternate was Marantha Orphanage, but they are unwilling to take us on at this time because of having three biological children. We've also found that to be the case with many other programs. It is just deemed too risky right now for people with more than two. We did have a lead on using ROTH, but although it is a VERY reputable program, the ongoing monthly childcare fees didn't seem like a good fit for us. To get to the point, it just seemed as though all doors to adopting from Haiti were closing. It didn't make sense since we seemed so sure we were called specifically to Haiti.

Part of the reason I was so weary last week was because I had been spinning my wheels checking on different programs trying to make things happen. One can only hear "no" so many times before you raise the white flag in surrender. And that's just what I did. I raised the flag and the conversation with God went something like this:
I can't do this anymore. I am weary Lord. I give it up to you. If the doors to Haiti are closed so be it. I will move on. I will "cut the cord". I get it Lord. We are not meant to adopt from Haiti. I don't know why everything pointed to the fact that we should, but it is obvious to me now that it is not to be. I am not going to make any more phone calls. I am not going to send any more e-mails. If you want me to adopt from Haiti then you will have to send someone to me. I. am. done.
So just TODAY we made the decision we were going to adopt from Ghana. I placed a call to our home study provider to see what it would take to get that updated for Ghana. I'd spoken to an agency that did work in Ghana. Ghana it is! Ghana is nice. Ghana is neat. Ghana is FAST. We are going to Ghana. Woo hoo for Ghana.

Then at 2:47 pm today God did just what I asked for. He sent someone to me. The e-mail went something like this:
Hey Stephanie! I came across your name today. I believe you guys had decided to go with another orphanage and that is fine. I know we haven't talked in forever, but out of the blue I've decided to contact you and see if you are still interested in adopting through us in HAITI. Let me know.
Did you hear it? Yep, there it was. The large vaccuum sucking us back into Haiti. Well played God. Well played.

19 comments:

Leslie said...

Isn't it good to know God is in control when we have no idea? Praying for God to lead you in EVERYTHING and for His will to be accomplished in your family and in you.

A Blessed Life said...

We also are adopting from Haiti. We also choose a little girl that we fell in love with and I visited for a week. We also had her mom come to the orphanage and take her back.
We didn't know what to do but we had peace that God would work it out. We were given 2 more referrals through the same orphanage that didn't work out because of their severe health issues. Number 4 - our daughter, I went to see last month. She should be coming home, we pray, in the next couple of months.
I don't understand the "whys" of our situation or yours but what a testimony when those children come home!
I look forward to sharing your journey.

Kathy said...

Thinking of you today.

Greg's Wife said...

I love when the Lord moves us along in amazing ways- keeping us on the path He has planned for us- because He realizes that we can't always see it ourselves! His tender care is so precious and personal.

Also, I am selfishly happy because I still envision you and I meeting in person on a trip to Haiti one day!

Annie said...

I really appreciate your sharing your "back story" in this post. I hadn't quite understood why you were so "stuck" on Haiti. Wow - that was a sign and now another one. I can't wait to keep up with your adventure.

Michelle said...

ooops here is where i meant to say well Played! Can't wait for you Stephanie. What a relief to have some direction and assurance. Praise Jesus!

The Gang's Momma said...

Can't wait to read the story as it continues to unfold. I'm all on my tippy toes waiting to hear! :)

Still praying . . . and so happy to know that He is answering all the prayers that have gone up on your behalf these recent months!

The Real Me said...

Following along prayerfully! Have you heard the Barlow Girl song Surrender? That is the song I sing/listen to whenever I am at one of those struggle points where I feel like I am playing tug of war with God (it happens way too often). I love looking back on our process and seeing how all of the steps lined up just perfectly when at the time it felt like we were wandering aimlessly.

Katy said...

WOW, WOW, WOW....isn't it amazing the way that God works??? Just keep trusting HIM, and everything will fall into place!! No worries...no phone calls....who was this email from? 3 Angels??? I was fascinated to hear just how you were led to Haiti...that reminds me so much of how I was "suddenly" overcome by the Holy Spirit in a very simple way when I made the decision to go to Haiti. That was not MY plan. But I'm SO glad it was His. =) I can't WAIT to hear the rest of the story..Love you friend!

Tammie said...

I love it when God answers my prayers like that. It is so neat to see Him move when we ask Him too. I am excited to hear that He is directing you in your adoption decisions and can't wait to see the child He brings to add to your family. Thanks for sharing your story!

Chapter Two Manmi said...

Wow! I'm curious who you are going to work with...but mostly look forward to following your journey!
Blessings!
K

The Combes Family said...

Thanks for posting your story on how God chose you to adopt one of haiti's children. Praying for you as you begin the next adoption journey.
Blessings,
Karen

Tereasa said...

Very cool. Honestly, when I was reading this post, I thought, "Gahna? Are you sure?" I'm glad you got sucked back in.

stephanie garcia said...

It has been such a winding journey thus far, but I am so thankful that God is still in control and has clearly directed you around the next corner! Can't wait to hear the details!

Lena Wright said...

Thanks for sharing this, Stephanie. I love you, and I am glad you're sticking with Haiti. Because I want to meet you in person some day soon. And because I am praying that Anchise comes back to you. Anything is possible with God.

Prayerfully,

L

Kathy Eden said...

Wow...a lot going on in that post! :o) I'm SO glad that God is speaking to you about what direction you should take. Keep listening to Him! {{{Hugs}}}

Michelle said...

I love your "Well played God. Well played." It just makes me smile! As I said the other day, always believing with you!

livingpurereligion said...

I love me some Stephanie! Your so much fun to talk to... and I usually hate talking on the phone:) I'm praying for you today!

Wife to the Rockstar said...

WOW! You guys have been on quite the journey.

I have been thinking about you a lot as we process our own loss. I hope you are doing okay.