She's Officially My Daughter...She Barfed on Me!

Well now I've been officially puked on by ALL my kids. She was crying in the pool & next thing I know she was barfing down my swimsuit. Good stuff!

This morning she wasn't my biggest fan. In fact, I think it's fair to say I was her least favorite person in the whole world. Peterson, however, LOVED me today (hooray for progress). When we left the O to go back to the guest house she was tense, but slowly started to loosen up. She even went in the Caribbean Market with me. Then right before lunch you could just see her relax and she was obviously much more comfortable with me. She's making more eye contact & let me feed her lunch (which obviously did not agree with her - tuna salad).

I had a great time with the kids in the nursery this morning. Rebecca is a complete & total completely adorable drama queen. Kervens is a smooth dude - I can tell he is going to be very popular with the ladies. Justin is a little monkey with the best smile. Peterson was being a sweetie, but decided to take a whack at me and quickly got put in time out by Jutane (poor buddy). Sara was a giggly girl. Caleb is just mellow. Layla was a silly girl hanging around my legs at every moment.

I also spent time with the kids downstairs. Elmise, Nata & Fritzson were cracking me up. It is so great to get to know these kids - they are GREAT!

Well, I'm off to watch my baby girl sleep.

Sje

She Called Me Mama...

...just 30 minutes ago for the first time. Amazing!!!!!

We spent the morning at the O. I got to love on Rebecca, Kervens, Caleb, Justin (sorry Cara, Peterson wasn't a fan of mine), Sarah, & Layla. I don't know if I am forgetting anyone.

I also took a bunch of pictures & can't wait to send them out.

It's HOT...we're going to swim now. Blessings to you all!

Greetings from Haiti!

Today was a most momentous day - I held our sweet baby girl! It was no different to me than if someone had put a newborn babe in my arms that I had just birthed. It was amazing to hold her, smell her hair, kiss her cheeks, to study every detail about her.

She was scared at first and cried (OK, wailed a little), but warmed up to the idea that I was her mama pretty quickly. The nannies were very helpful in helping her to know that I was mama. I even got a kiss bye-bye!

I am head-over-heels for this girl. God is good!

A Heart Divided

It's hard to feel such excitement & anticipation and sadness for the ones you leave behind at the same time. The flight home will be the same, but in reverse. My heart is about to be divided more completely between two worlds. Lord give me strength.

Don’t be afraid, for I am with you.
Don’t be discouraged, for I am your God.
I will strengthen you and help you.
I will hold you up with my victorious right hand.
Isaiah 41:10

Soon...

Thank you Lord for this amazing journey. It is only by Your grace we have come so far. We trust in You alone to finish the work You have begun.

Prayers for My Dear Ones

The anxiousness of my departure is starting to get the best of our household. I am completely at peace about this trip (praise the Lord!), but my dear ones are beginning to realize it is actually happening soon.

If you could say a little prayer of peace & comfort for them as I prepare to leave & while I am gone I would appreciate it.

8 Days

In eight days my life will be changed forever...forever.

Use me, Lord, and let me serve
in every way I can.
Let me channel love and hope,
According to Your plan.
Show me the way, lead me to where
There is a plea for help and care.
Then let me be the light and means
To be the answer to a prayer.
Use my talents and my strengths
That I might serve You best
by sharing all You've given me,
For which I'm truly blessed.
Use me, Lord, give me the words
To comfort and console.
Then guide me with each step I take
To touch the heart of some dear soul.
For I have much that I can give
And I offer willingly
to be Your vessel while I serve...
Dear precious Lord, use me.
~Patience Allison Hartbauer

Breakfast Time Conversation

Mr. B: Mom, you goin' to Haiti?

Me: Yes

Mr. B: Whatchoo gonna do dere?

Me: See Anchise

Mr. B: I wanna see Anchise too! I wanna go!

Me: Sorry Mr. B you can't go with mommy.

Mr. B: That's not fair...that's MY Anchise.

...see even a 3 year old can see that it's not fair she has to stay away so long.

And Then Came B

If you have seen us anytime in the last five days you most certainly have heard that it is B's birthday. He has declared this momentous occasion to anyone within shouting distance in any location - IT'S MY BIRTHDAY!!!!

Mr. B came into the world with a bang...literally. OK, maybe it was more like a loud pop, but nonetheless we all looked surprised. The doctor had been trying to induce labor all day with no avail. The dreaded pitocin did nothing for me - it was cranked up high for hours with no action. Jeff and my sister-in-law Jalaine were talking in the labor room and I was sitting in the rocking chair when we all heard a very loud & audible pop followed by a large gush of water. An intense couple of hours later our little bundle came into the world and all was well.

You may have guessed Mr. B is quite the firecracker. You will almost always find him with a truck (or 3) in his hand. We like to say he is like 100 lbs. of dynamite shoved in a 10 lb. package. He is fun, he is feisty, he is full of life, and we adore him.

Happy 3rd Birthday Mr. B - we love you!!!!

A Big, Beautiful Smile...

...that melts my heart.

Sweet Feet...

...will soon fill these shoes. God is good!

O Lord,

I will honor and praise your name,

for you are my God.

You do such wonderful things!

You planned them long ago,

and now you have accomplished them.

Isaiah 25:1

Takin' a Crack at Creole

At Leslie's recommendation I ordered up my copy of Simple Language for Adoptive Families. I'm praying this will help bridge the communication gap with Anchise while I am in Haiti. It will also be good reading/listening material while I am on the plane and on the ride to Colleen's house.

I can't believe I will hold her in 14 days. Reality is sinking in & I am a little beside myself - dare I say I am little giddy! I know I will probably be completely overwhelmed once I am there, but to know I will actually see her sweet face in person makes me smile. God is good!

Hooray for Pictures!

Pharmacy Fun

I went this morning and picked up my prescription for Chloroquine (anti-malaria med). I just about fell over when they told me 12 little pills were $58.00! My reaction, of course, was "are you sure that's right". Thankfully they re-ran it through insurance and it ended up being only $11. Whew...

I love reading the warnings that accompany a prescription. The highlight of this one included "may cause blurred vision - using this medicine may lessen your ability to drive, operate machinery or perform hazardous tasks". I'm praying I won't have this problem, but if I do it will all be worth it because this is more than just a prescription, it is yet another sign that I am getting ready to go to Haiti. Praise God!

Nesting

In 17 days I will hold our sweet Anchise for the very first time. And while I know she will NOT be coming home with me, I have this strange desire to "nest" around our home. I have a need to clean & prepare our home for this little girl that will not live here for very likely a year or more. Sigh.

I would appreciate your prayers as I prepare for this trip. I am praying that my children at home will be well in my absence. I am praying that God is preparing Anchise's heart for our meeting. I am praying for her birth family & their safety in the midst of the storms in Haiti. I am praying that Jeff will have the ability to handle everything at home. I am praying that my heart will also be prepared and that the Lord would use me for His glory in this country.

Search me, O God, and know my heart;
test me and know my anxious thoughts.
Point out anything in me that offends you,
and lead me along the path of everlasting life.
Psalm 139:23-24

It's Been a Year...

It just occurred to me that it was just over a year ago that God placed it on our hearts to adopt from Haiti. It seems we have come so far & yet we have so far to go.

This time last year I was trying to figure out who would do our homestudy. What would it involve? Would we "pass"? Where would the money come from? How would I ever get all of the paperwork gathered?

It has been a year filled with an abundance of joy & tears. Never before has God been so evident to me. I have made friends with virtual strangers who I now hold dear. I have been grown & stretched in ways I couldn't have imagined. My heart has been changed. I long to do more...to be more.

I do not know what the future holds or have all of the answers. Contemplating the "what ifs" of a Haitian adoption has the potential to consume me . The only sure thing I have in all of this chosen madness is to cling to my Father. He is at the very center of it all and it is His love that sustains me.

Faith is the confidence that what we hope for will actually happen; it gives us assurance about things we cannot see.
Hebrews 11:1

How Cute is This?

We were blessed with another precious little dress to take to baby girl. Isn't it cute? It will only be made cuter when she is wearing it and I am holding her. Only 21 days...Lord willing.

Everlasting God

The kids and I have listened to Lincoln Brewster's Everlasting God several times this week. We all LOVE the song! It's truly amazing to know that no matter what I am going through, no matter how weak I am, my strength will rise as I wait and HAVE FAITH in God!

Have you never heard?

Have you never understood?

The Lord is the everlasting God,

the Creator of all the earth.

He never grows weak or weary.

No one can measure the depths of his understanding.

He gives power to the weak

and strength to the powerless.

Even youths will become weak and tired,

and young men will fall in exhaustion.

But those who trust in the Lord will find new strength.

They will soar high on wings like eagles.

They will run and not grow weary.

They will walk and not faint.

Isaiah 40:28-31

First Day of School 2008

I can't believe school has started again!

Where has the summer gone?

Of course, Mr. B had to get in a little playground time before we left Keaton's school...

25 Days

Dear Lord,
Thank you for Anchise.
Thank you for the changes you have
made in ME as we seek to bring her home.
Prepare her heart Lord.
Prepare my heart Lord.
Help me to be the mother she needs me to be.
Give me your wisdom & understanding.
Thank you for this precious gift.
Guard her & keep her safe.
In Jesus Name I Pray,
Amen